By | April 20, 2010 at 9:03 am | 2 comments | Uncategorized

LIFE IS LEARNING at TOM’S UNIVERSITY  — a new class every day.  Listen below

Some of the life lessons explored in this class are:

  • Every moment, if you’re alive, you’re faced with a problem, even if the problem is as simple as “Where do I put my attention right now?”
  • The most basic problems are ever-present:  How do I handle this moment?  How do I stay alive?  How do I take care of myself?  How do I show up fully in my life?  How do you show up fully in your life?  How do you take care of your life? — The most basic, ever-present problem is: how to take care of yourself this moment?
  • How to be your self
  • How to share your self
  • How to plan your time
  • Embrace your problems  (rather than fighting your problems or pushing on your problems)
  • “Embrace your problems” is just another way of saying “Embrace your Life” because “Life is Problems”
  • The most important problem every day, every moment of the day, is “how to take care of myself?” in this moment
  • Another important problem every day, every moment of every day, is “how can I stay conscious in this present moment?”
  • Life is problems:  Go solve them!  Go meet them!  Go embrace them!  Go have fun with them!  Go play with them!  Go challenge yourself to meet the problems of the day!

LISTEN TO A NEW CLASS EVERY DAY –  classes are posted a week to two weeks after the actual class.  If you want to hear the class of the day each day, follow Tom’s University on Twitter

Recorded Thursday April 15, 2010

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  1. michelle falvey (8 years ago)

    hi tom – it’s michelle, from the ipnb seminars – finally checking out your university, and finding it very charming, helpful, and synchronistic! sitting here in my office wondering which ‘problem’ to tackle (after listening to your april 15 podcast) – and liking the hearty-embracing approach!

    here are a few offerings from me: “The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes” Proust
    read a great piece on the topic of procrastination in the latest issue of the New Yorker, called “Later” by James Surowiecki – found it added some context (psychological, age-old human) around this challenging issue – I think it complements the quest for understanding of the challenges of achieving/maintaining present moment awareness…

    anyway, thanks for letting me in on the gift of your educational journey. I recall that you will not be attending seminar’s regularly…I hope to see you sometime…I will also be attending the IPSB/AAI conference with DS, Mary Main, Eric Hesse in december

    peace! michelle

  2. TSH (8 years ago)

    Thanks so much Michelle for coming to Tom’s University and for your support and kind words. Glad you get the gist of “Life is Problems”. It is proving to be a fundamental principle at Tom’s University. Today’s class is “Be the Grown-up For Your Problems” (probably won’t make it to the blog for a while, since I backed off from posting a class every day), but I’m finding it a very exciting class. Here’s the gist of what I got: most people (including me until I started to “get” this a few years ago) [well, I don't have any research to substantiate the "most" part of that statement, so I'll reframe it, "a lot of people] go around with a state of mind that there is “life” [& this is "good" -- there are "no problems" when "life" is going well] and then there are “problems” ["oh, no!" "problems" "help, help" "bad" "something's wrong" -- and "life" stops until there are no more "problems" because when our nervous systems perceive something as "wrong" or "bad", it triggers our fight-flight-freeze/stress response automatic stuff-- which is good/great when there really is a clear and present danger to one's safety or the safety of loved ones]. The metaphor I was getting in the moment of this realization was really apt — because “life” really does kinda “stop” when fight-flight is triggered. And so we need a “Grown-up” for our problems, whether we’re an infant, a toddler, or a 40-year old, because it’s “the Grown-up’s” job to evaluate whether this is a “danger problem” or a “life problem”. If it’s a “life problem”, we need the Grown-up on duty to help us calm down and focus on problem solving, rather than going into “oh, no! something’s wrong because I have this problem”.

    I got carried away there. Hope that made sense. I think my stuff works so much better on audio than in writing. If my quick writing here doesn’t make sense, you’ll have to wait til today’s class gets posted. What’s the word: “Coming attraction!” My next goal is to start doing Video classes. I’m working out the technical requirements for that.

    Really great to hear from you. And I will definitely be at the AAI conference with Dan Siegel, Mary Main and Eric Hesse. I took the AAI training in Canada a few years ago — not with them, but it was quite an experience. I’m looking forward to hearing them and Dan work together. The attachment research as integrated with the brain research by Dan is “where it’s at” for mental health for sure. In a way all my Tom’s University classes are my unique way of synthesizing the attachment and interpersonal neurobiology, plus alot of body-mind integration study & teaching. Also I’m going to do my best to come to Dan’s Nov. seminar.

    Enjoy your “Life Problems” and I wish you no “Danger Problems”